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Why I put my kids to bed at 7:00 … it is a hot topic, that’s for sure! When our children were younger, we had all of our kids in bed around 7:00 every night. They were asleep around 7:30 every night.
UPDATE: This post was written several years ago in 2014, when our kids were much younger, but I believe that it is important. We still maintain a regular bedtime, but they no longer go to bed as early as they once did.
I owe so many well-rested nights and happy children during the day to the fact that we have a regular and early bedtime for our children. In fact, many Dutch parents put their kids to bed between 6:00 & 7:00 for very similar reasons that we have an early bedtime.
Before I begin- remember that although this works for us, it is not for everyone. As with all of my advice, do what works best for your family. ♥
Our kids (ages 2-9) are in bed by 7:00
Yes, our young children are in bed at 7:00. It is 2014, and my children range from 2 years old to 9 years old. Our 9 year old now goes to bed at 8:00, because he is older and needs less sleep. Until they are 9 years old, 7:00 remains their bedtime.
Last week, a fellow blogger shared my post about what to do when your 2 year old is still waking at night. In the post I talked about our early bedtime and gave some life-changing advice for our toddler that was waking up. That post led someone to leave the comment “Who puts their kid to bed at 7:00 pm?”
WE DO.
Yes, We have received mixed feedback about this, but it works for us. I know that 7:00 is early. I know that it cuts into their day, but I can tell you that I would rather have happy kids for 12 hours a day than tired or grumpy kids for 13 hours a day. (Our older kids wake up at 7:00 no matter what time they go to sleep. Really!)
Playing hard in the day makes kids tired by bedtime!
Our four YOUNG kids play hard during the day. They run around a lot and they spend a lot of time outside with us.
They are busy in the day, so they are tired when 7:00 rolls around.
They DO NOT nap anymore and they are just plain worn out by the evening, even if they don’t want to admit it (and they never do! haha!)
We have tried to push this back when we are on vacation, but they just aren’t as relaxed and easy-going the next day. They are a little more on edge, just like we are (as adults) when we don’t get the rest that we need. I put them to bed early because I want them to be smiling & ready to take on the day. 🙂
Plus- the are usually asleep in 5-15 minutes, so I know they are tired.
Do they ever stay up late?
YES! Once a month they each stay up late for Their Special Night. Plus, every night, our oldest son gets to have Read-Alone time in his room before bed, too. Or they can read their spelling words while they fall asleep with this little hack.
If that have football or wrestling, they are up even later, but we AIM for an early bedtime! Our younger children have a really hard time waking up for school at 7:00 am when he doesn’t get his full 12 hours of sleep, so I do try to get him to bed as early as possible.
I want him to be able to focus at school, be energetic in play and at his sports and be happy at home! This little chart can help you to know how much sleep they truly need…
Kidshealth.org says:
“Most kids between 5 and 12 get about 9.5 hours a night, but experts agree that most need more. When your body doesn’t have enough hours to rest, you may feel tired or cranky, or you may be unable to think clearly. You might have a hard time following directions, or you might have an argument with a friend over something really silly. A school assignment that’s normally easy may feel impossible, or you may feel clumsy playing your favorite sport or instrument.
Sleep Impacts Growth & Health
One more reason to get enough sleep: If you don’t, you may not grow as well. That’s right, researchers believe too little sleep can affect growth and your immune system — which keeps you from getting sick.” All in all- sleep is important! Your kids need it, even if they don’t WANT it.”
Do you have time with them in the evening?
I am not saying that this is right for everyone, so please hear me out. My husband and I both work from home, so this works for us. Two of our kids stay home with us during the day, and our older children go to school until 3:30. We have plenty of family time daily from 3:30 until bedtime.
Before my husband worked from home, I used to have the kids showered and in their pajamas before he got home, to give us more time together. Remember that it is quality over quantity.
Does it happen every night?
7:00 bedtime does not happen every single night, but it’s our goal every night. Most nights, one of our kids will be at practice until 8:00, so of course bedtime is later on that night.
Sometimes, it’s even earlier than 7:00. A few years ago, when my youngest kids were 3 & 5, they would fall asleep in the car at 6:00 on our way to drop the older kids off at practice… and I just take them up to bed and they slept ALL NIGHT LONG. They never woke up during the transition to bed. I know it’s crazy, but when I try to wake them, they are NOT happy, so on those nights, I just let it go.
It’s good for your marriage:
My husband and I see each other all day long while we work from home or while we are spending time with the kids, but at night we have time to watch a show, play a board game, etc…
Now, I am not saying that this is why we put them to bed early or that it is why we started, because it’s not, but we do enjoy that time together. Did you know that the #1 fear of preteens and teenagers is divorce among their parents? Quality time together, with your spouse, reduces this risk greatly.Make it a point to tell your children that you are going to spend time with your spouse.
Children Need Sleep
Remember- our bedtime certainly isn’t for everyone, but it works for us. It is healthy for our kids to get that amount of sleep and it helps them overall. Quality sleep + healthy foods make a huge difference for children (and adults).
On the other hand…
I wanted to share a story, for those of you that have a late bedtime. My very dear, long-time friend, Julia, has always had a late bedtime and her children follow her lead. They stay up well past 10:00 and it works for them. They sleep in every morning and they are happy, healthy, smart children. Her children are the same ages as mine. I know that I need to wait until 11:00 or later to talk to her on the phone. 🙂
All of that to say that this is what works for us, but it is up to you to find out what works best for your family.
I hope this helped to shed a little light on families with early bedtimes. Sleep well… no matter the time!♥
When I had one child, I let him go to bed whenever he felt like it. I didn’t work and I coslept so it was not a big deal that he went to bed late with me. It worked out for us! When I went back to work, the late bedtime was not working anymore. I switched him to 7:00pm for bedtime and I woke him around 6:45 in the morning to get him out the door for daycare. Today and four years later, he is now in bed by 8. Half the time I am dragging him out of bed at 7. (This kid loves his sleep) I had twins two and a half years ago and I refuse to let them stay up late like their older brother did. Their bed time is 6pm. One of the twins sleeps until 7am (yes, 13 hours!) while his brother is pretty much all over the place (He’s a mess, sleep-wise). They hardly ever nap anymore. When they do, they go to bed at 9pm.
Ours are the same way – nap time means that they stay up a little later…
ps- 13 hours is great!
I’m really glad that I took the time to read this post. To be honest, the title really put me off. This post was shared on facebook today and I usually don’t comment, but as I reading the comments, I felt bad for parents who were defending their parenting skills/style. My comment was that it is not so much what time, but how much as you have written here. For instance, I have a friend who has a preschooler and high schooler (who is involved in a lot of athletics). The preschooler takes long naps, but a very early bedtime is not possible within their family dynamic.
exactly! 🙂
I completely agree with this article, my kids have been on this type of schedule their whole lives. They are 10, 11, and 13 they get up between 5:45am and 6:30 am Mon thru Fri, they go to bed between 7 and 8 during the week..on weekends its free reign for them. Of course during their sports, their bed times change!!
Same here 🙂
I agree and disagree with you. But it’s more on the what works for you just like you said. My 2 girls are 3 and 4, in headstart and pre-k, and I do my best to have them in bed by 8pm everynight. My son’s 9, so he gets a extra 30 mins up. I do this so we can read together, play a game, etc so he gets his quality time with me without the little ones interrupting.
And yes you can tell when they went to bed late, or had to get up earlier than normal. Those are the times that work for my family. Each family is different.
exactly!! 🙂 Doing what works for your family is the key to success.
I’m 11 yr old and I share room with my 7yo sister. Our bedtime is 7:00 pm and we can read until 7:30 pm. Mom then turns off the light in our room.
I think my bedtime is too early and my friends think also. They all are allowed to stay up much later. It’s unfair that I’ve the same bedtime as my little sister, .
But my mom says, your bedtime is always been 7pm, you can even read half an hour, you and your sister are used to this bedtimes. This is our routine and it will not be changed for the time being.
I’m afraid that I’m stuck with a 7pm bedtime for a long time.
So I think most 11 yr olds with a 7pm bedtime don’t like the early bedtime!
🙂 Thanks for leaving this comment.
I put my boys to bed @ 7PM too! I agree when they sleep enough they wake up more refreshed. I have tried letting them sleep @ 8PM on weekends but they still wake up early so if we’re home on weekends I put them to bed @ 7PM. During the week they’re always in bed by 7PM!!!
🙂 We are the same way w/ the weekends.
Hi. A friend sent me the link to your post. I found it really interesting as I was having this discussion with friends. I am a British expat living in Texas and my children are all in bed for 7pm (my daughter is actually in bed for 6.30pm each night!) 7pm is the standard bedtime back home- I was a teacher in a primary school (elementary equivalent) and all of my pupils went to bed at or around 7pm. It is totally the norm to go to bed at that time (children’s tv programming ends at this time too) Its a strange concept for me that children go to bed later here!!
It seems normal to me, too. lol. I always went to bed early as a child and our kids just expect it and they wake up refreshed.
My son is now 28 years old and about to be a father for the first time, and I will definitely be sharing this article. He went to bed by 7 PM until he was in fourth grade – then we went to 8 PM. It was junior high before we allowed 9:30. Since we started that early bed time when he was little, it was no problem. He was healthier for it, and my husband and I enjoyed our couple time each night. I wish more parents would take this to heart.
Oh congratulations to you (and your son!)
I agree- I wish so, too. Thank you.
Hi,
I could not agree more with your article. Some of my friends look at me oddly when I say that they are in bed for 7sh. You are right they are tired that is why they go to bed at that time. We do have some after school clubs that mean bedtime goes back a bit. We needed our me time. I know that some of my friends go to bed later than I do so may be they get that time just later in the evening. No one wants me to go to bed later, as I am grumpy when I don’t get my 8 hours. I wonder where the boys get it from 🙂 thank you for writing this article.
Same here- its not every night (when life gets in the way) but I do aim for 7. 🙂
Ps- your comment made me laugh!
Our 6-year old first grader goes to bed between 8:30-9:00 and wakes at 8 am (generally on his own & pleasant) to get to school at 9. That’s 11-11 ½ hours of sleep. If I put him to bed at 7, he’d be awake at 5 and tired before he even got to school! The later bedtime is not only because he doesn’t have to get up until 8, but also because we have an older daughter involved in dance and some night its 7-7:30 before we get home, and most importantly because my husband leaves for work before the kids are awake and doesn’t get home until 7:15. It’s VERY important that we eat as a family (lots of research to support that too). Besides, my son, especially, would only see my husband on the weekends if he went to bed at 7! That time together as a family is crucial as well! No single rule works for all kids or all families.
I completely agree that eating as a family is important. Do what works best for your family (as I put in the post- different strokes for different folks) 🙂
I’ve always put my daughter to bed at 7 and caught a lot of flack. No one understands. But my little girl has never fell asleep in preschool or school.
Same here 🙂
Our kids are now 12 and 13 and I still try to get them to bed at 7pm, this doesn’t work every night as they have outside activities and sport now but this has always been their bedtime and I hope it stays that way for a while longer. They now go to bed and read for a while but I always maintain “my parenting time is over by that time” and I can get on with other stuff I have to do. I have often had negative feedback but I don’t care, we all know our own kids best.
We get negative feedback, too, but it really works best for our family.
@ Jennifer,
I think 7pm bedtime for ba 13yr old is ratherv weird. What do your 12 and 13yr old think about that bedtime? do they agree with it?
Ask your pediatricians!!!! They prefer children have 10-12 hours sleep. They are growing, they need this! Do the research…. 7:00 pm is completely reasonable!
Thanks for this! I also put my little guy down between 6:30-7. He is 14 months, but he set this bedtime around 6 months. I don’t think fighting a baby’s natural urge is a good idea. He does best with 12 hours at night and keeping him up later just makes for a meltdown!
I agree with you, it’s so Important that children have enough rest.
We were very lucky with our daughter, from the age of five weeks old she was sleeping through the night, 7pm to 6.30am and we have stayed with the 7pm bedtime routine.
It works well for us all, she is well rested and never gets cranky, unless she is poorly of course, And my husband and I have time to finally talk without any interruptions from little one.
If you find a routine that works, stick to it, it’s what suits you best as a family.