I wanted to write about why I really do enjoy spending time with our kids because it doesn’t matter if I am lying down with them or just baking something in the kitchen– the time with them is important.
Being a parent is hard. I am not saying that it is easy. I think that being a parent is a roller-coaster of emotions… filled with ups and downs, but I also think that what I saw on my Facebook page this week changed things for me. A lot.
I saw so many videos about the joy of sending kids back to school, simply so the kids won’t be home anymore.
I saw parents writing about how they are tired of being a parent and how they are annoyed by their kids.
I understand because I know that at some point, we all hit our low points where we are just TIRED, but I don’t agree.
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I have actually been sad at the thought of summer ending.
I love spending time with these sweet kids. ♥
However, in the mix of all of the “complaint” posts on Facebook, something else came across my Facebook feed. My friend, Sharla, wrote this:
“Perspective can change so quickly. Today, I get to plan a birthday party for my son while a friend has to plan a funeral for hers.
So many of the things I often think of as a chore are actually an incredible privilege.”
How incredibly true. Being a mom is a privilege. I’m blessed to be called Mother by four beautiful children and not a day goes by that I don’t remember that and recognize it. It wasn’t easy for us to have children and it’s not something that I take lightly.
You see, I recently read an article called “Motherhood isn’t fun” and the next day I saw one being shared that was called “We don’t need to like being a parent.”
It hurts my heart to read this.
My thought, when I read this, is “How on earth do these children feel if their mother doesn’t like being their mom?” The joy on our kids faces when they see ME happy to see THEM is enough to make my heart beat.
The hardest part of me is that it takes a rude awakening to realize that nothing is for sure. You could wake up tomorrow and it could all be gone.
Six friends of mine have lost their children over the past several years.
One of my friends woke up to find her son had passed away in his sleep.
One of my friends went on a family vacation when her one-year-old daughter passed out and never woke up.
Last year, one of my friends received the phone call that her teenage son was in a car accident and didn’t survive.
Another friend’s daughter died in an accident at home and then just this year, my other friend lost her son to a drowning.
Yesterday, a fellow blogger lost her son to a boating accident. You just never know.
Just writing these words makes me fill with tears… not just filled with tears- I have tears rolling down my face because the mere thought of losing one of my children is an unbearable thought. It literally makes my stomach hurt. I have to put it out of my mind.
So while motherhood may be hard today: You might pack 4 lunches that no one eats, you might make a dinner that looks great and have your kids complain because it isn’t chicken nuggets, you might have to change your child’s shirt because they spilled milk on it right before school, you might be exhausted because 3 of your 4 kids woke up last night (all true stories), but you know what? We have them… they are ours.
They are here and I get to talk to them and hug them and tell them how much I love them every single day.
How amazing is that, just in itself?
My grandma used to say “If you aren’t going to enjoy being with your kids… why have them?” She said it all of the time. I took it in, even before I had kids, and it has stayed in my heart all these years.
(I love this little reminder that I found on K-Love)
Try to soak in these moments and just enjoy them. Don’t just go through the motions.
- If you are stressed, there is a reason. Maybe you are doing everything for your kids, but remember that your kids WANT to feel like they are contributing. They want to feel valued. If your kids need to do more, TEACH them to do more. Don’t expect it until you teach it. At the same time, kids need to feel respected and loved, so respect and love them. Let them feel valued and appreciated, just like YOU want to feel valued and appreciated. What goes around comes around.
- Let them talk to you. Whenever they want. Listen to them, without giving advice and without passing judgment.
- Play pretend with your kids.
- Bake cookies with them.
- Laugh at their knock-knock jokes that don’t make any sense.
- Hold them responsible for their choices.
- Give them responsibilities around the house and be sure that they are completed.
- Build lego sets and let them do it, even if it takes them an hour longer for them to do it than it would take you.
- Encourage them to do their chores, even though it is easier for you to just do it.
- Read with them and let them ask you questions while you read (the same book for the 3rd time today)
- Remind them that they matter in your family and they need to help. We can’t do it without everyone. We all play a role.
- Cuddle them
- Turn off all electronics, then collect them and keep them for a few weeks (trust me on this one- they’ll be happier!)
- Play a board game with them.
- Be with your kids today and just enjoy being with them.
- Love them. Let them love you. Say it often and remember it every day.
- Hug them often… and mean it.
- Be grateful. Say three things that you are grateful for every day, but encourage your kids to do the same. (Do it at dinnertime)
- Did you know that a child’s biggest worry is that his parent is stressed? Be happy … your kids will be happy right back.♥
You’re welcome to download this free calendar & I’ll send you some tips that you might like, via email:
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