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It’s funny. We think about all of the things that we will do when our children are born. We rock them, hold them, sing to them, enjoy every minute of them. 

Not much time passes before we begin looking to the future when we start saying, “When the kids are older, I’ll be able to…” It’s only when those moments have passed that we realized that we had missed them.

When the kids are older...

It was a few years back that it dawned on me. Our kids were still young at the time and going anywhere required planning and patience. 

One day, while having a conversation with my mom, I remember saying“When all of the kids are a few years older, it will be easy to go anywhere!” 

Her response was one that I won’t forget:
“I always said that, too
 ‘When the kids are out of diapers, things will be so much easier.
When they are done with preschool, I’ll be able to start saving our money.  
When the kids are in elementary school, I’ll have so much more time.  
When the kids are older, I’ll be able to…  
but there is always something else.  Enjoy them now.”

A child that is standing in the grass

The following day, I received a comment on a post that I had written, called ‘Mommy, Will you lay with me?” The comment was from a mother that had lost her child when he was five years old.  
Five years old.  

I can’t imagine- my heart broke for her (and it still does).   

Her comment was simple, yet so meaningful: She simply wanted the time with her child back.  She wanted to have those moments together again.  She stressed the importance of appreciating every moment that you have with your children and never taking those moments for granted.  

These conversations both served as reminders that I still remember today:
There is always going to be something else, something that we want, but we can’t let that stop us from taking advantage of this time… today.  We can’t just let these days pass idly by, while we wait for our kids to get older.

The passing of time is like a double-edged sword.

  • I’m no longer waking up to feed babies at night, yet I can’t fall asleep easily at night as I look at the clock, hoping I can fall asleep soon thinking, “If I fall asleep right now, I’ll still get ____ hours of sleep.”
  • I’m no longer carrying a baby around in a carrier strapped to my body, but now I have to remind my kids to stop playing to come to hug their mom. 😉 
  • I’m no longer rocking someone to sleep, but I miss how they looked at me longingly while trying to keep their heavy eyelids open, just to look at mom for a minute longer.
  • I’m no longer planning my days around naptimes, yet I miss the days of lazy afternoons.

A baby lying on a bed
My words will change.

The day will come when my words change from “When our kids are older, we’ll be able to” to “When our kids were younger, we were able to…” I’ve already started saying those things with our older kids (teens!)

I don’t want to have to regret any of these moments with our kids. I want to know that I used this time wisely. I want to know that I enjoyed every minute that I could, that I taught them all of those life-lessons that come from late-night conversations, that I demonstrated examples of how to be caring & responsible.

Babies Don’t Keep, but neither do toddlers, school-aged kids, or teens… 

Babies Don't Keep

Play that board game, build those puzzles, read those books, play with them instead of just watching them, or take that vacation.

Remember that even if things don’t go as planned, you took this time for your family, and they will be better because of it.  
You stepped out of your comfort zone to embrace this moment and enjoy this moment.  

Don’t Wait… 

We can’t predict the future, but we are in control of how we spend our time now.   When I was younger, my mom sang this song to me… and I now sing it to my own children:

“Que Sera Sera. 
Whatever will be, will be. 
The future’s not ours to see. 
Que Sera Sera… what will be, will be.”

Aren’t those wise words?  Que Sera Sera.   The future’s not ours to see.   All that we have is the present. 

Making mom laugh!

As parents, we have the power to teach our children, shape their character,  and show them a wonderful world.   I read a quote once that I wanted to share it with you.  While I may not get it exactly right, I’ll give it my best shot…

Children may remember many things that you did for them in their childhood, but they will always remember you for the feeling that you cherished them.  

How are you going to do that today?  Here are some suggestions. 

A close up 30-day printable calendar to spend one on one time with child


Hi there!

I’m Becky, a former elementary school teacher turned certified child development therapist and blogger. I work at home with my husband and together we are raising (and partially homeschooling) our four children in the Carolinas. I love diet coke, ice cream, and spending time with my family.

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  1. Wow! I just found your blog today and I LOVE IT! This post especially resonated with me because I used to spend a lot of time thinking, “I’ll finally have time to paint/write/teach when the kids are older. That’s when I’ll start seriously marketing myself.”
    My husband travels for work and is gone about 50% of the time. We have 3 kids: 2 girls (5 and 4) and a rambunctious boy (2). We also have a cat and dog (whom I lovingly refer to as my first children). But regardless of how much I love all these creatures, life can occasionally be pretty overwhelming. Ok, more than occasionally.
    Trust me, things have gotten better, but they only improved once I became intentional about my thinking. Before when I would put life on hold, waiting for the kids to get older, I’d end up feeling resentful towards my children. And then I’d feel guilty for feeling resentful, and then I’d start questioning myself as a mother, and pretty soon I’d be in a downward spiral towards depression.
    In fact, last October I started feeling so depressed that I thought my family might be better off without me. Talk about a wake up call!
    With much support (and a Master’s degree in counseling that was getting really dusty from neglect ?), I began to stop myself when negative thoughts popped in my head and intentionally made myself think positively. Yes, it felt odd at first, but I knew I had to stick with it…and I knew if I did it would work (cognitive behavioral therapy).
    I still struggle with living in the moment, but that’s okay. I can accept all the noise and chaos and exhaustion because I know its temporary (and precious).
    Once I allowed myself to enjoy my blessings, my professional life improved almost immediately.
    I’m now teaching middle and high school art part time, I was sought out for 2 separate mural jobs, and I decided to continue having summer art camps. But most importantly, I’m enjoying my children. I don’t make excuses when they ask (several times a day) to do art projects or play a game or go to the park. I sometimes would like to make excuses, but once I get into the thick of an outing or activity with my kids, I completely forget about those excuses!

    I look forward to reading more of your blog!

    1. That was just about the sweetest comment! I’m so happy for you that you worked through it (good for you for knowing that you deserved it!) and your kids are so blessed to have you for their mama!

  2. I also have said that word”when the kids get older, I’ll be able to do many things. Indeed, even though my kids are starting to go to school, I don’t think I have more time for me to do something to achieve my dream. One day, I heard a radio program which to interview a mommy. She has a kids and she has a dream which is open a dessert restaurant. At first, She think that she had to wait until the kids grow up than achieve the goal. However, she found that she was busy in every stage of the kids grow. At last, she started her business so that she thinks she would not regret when she gets old. I’m appreciate her, her story encourage me to do something before my kids get older.

  3. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with all these wonderful Moms!
    I just starting reading blog and feel like my thoughts are flowing through your words. I also was a teacher, a mom and am now a grandmother of three little precious ones. I am very blessed to be able to be with each of them frequently. Keep communicating and I’ll keep reading so I can keep up with your helpful hints!
    Enjoy your little ones – time goes so quickly!

  4. This is such a positive post.
    When you are a SAHM it is so easy to become frustrated and weary.
    The kids take a lot out of you, but there will come a time when you wished they were little munchkins again.
    Every mom has said this to me!
    Thank you

  5. I really love this post! This is something I really try to do but sometimes loose focus on. I came across your blog yesterday and am totally hooked! I love the way you write and the topics you choose. I am just starting out on my blogging journey and if I can ever come close to stirring up emotions in readers like you just did with me, it will be so worth it. Thank you for such a great blog and for helping us all be better mums. Thank you