Today I am happy to share these 8 tips for a stronger marriage. Your marriage is important and it needs your attention, especially if you are going to grow your marriage after kids.
Marriages can last when couples are willing to be open and honest with one another, using clear communication.
Tips for a stronger marriage:
1. Be confident
Your partner fell in love with you because you are a confident, balanced and happy person who lit him/her up the minute you enter the room. Be that person again!
2. Exert effort
It is important to put in the hard work that comes into creating the marriage to a partnership. Always make sure that there is passion and gratitude between you and your spouse.
3. Do not play victim
There is no victim in a marriage. Express how you feel. If you think that you are no longer being valued, it is important to communicate this to your spouse. Be open. Do not make him/her feel guilty. Just being open and honest can help you to avoid divorce and figure out how you can go through the storms that you encounter in full flying colors. Believe in your partnership and in yourselves.
4. Take action
Showing is better than telling. Actions speak louder than words. Express appreciation and compliments to your partner. Praise is important. Your spouse will feel more confident knowing that s/he is appreciated and will therefore exert positivity in the partnership. Smile at each other, laugh at your partner’s jokes and share your gratitude for good things that your spouse has done. Check out my #1 marriage tip here.
5. Avoid letting negative emotions cloud your decisions
A marriage can have an extremely emotional time that leads to arguments especially when it comes to financial concerns. Whatever decision we make in a marriage, we must be emotionally balanced. People make bad decision when their emotions are at its highest peak. Don’t say things that could hurt your partner in the heat of the moment. Communication is the key to grow your marriage even after you have kids. Communicate what you want from your partner and/or from the situation. If both of you are not on the same page, try to see eye to eye and come to a compromise.
6. Empathize with your partner
Care to their emotional needs. This brings you closer together and strengthens the ties that you already have. Is your partner going through some phase that you don’t necessarily understand? Try to ask him or her about it, communicate and then make him/her feel that you are there. Focus on his/her feelings and also tell your partner what you think about it.
7. Speak a second language
Study your mate like a book. Learn your partner’s cues for affirmation, attention and intimacy. Learn to speak your spouse’s emotional language as well as love language. Also make sure that s/he understands yours.
I highly recommend this book, The 5 Love Languages.
8. Improve for the better
Do not hold grudges. At the same time, if it hurts, explain to your partner why it does. Sometimes these criticisms are uncalled for or are mere misunderstandings. Do not grovel nor act like the victim. The more open and effective you are, the more you can strengthen your marriage.
Ensure that your emotional assets are strong enough that a divorce or any sign of divorce is pending and up in the air. Do not be suspicious of your partner. The minute there is doubt, speak up. Be fair and comply with what your partner needs or wants and always keep the communication lines open. Find ways to strengthening marriage as soon as you can.
MORE POSTS THAT YOU MIGHT LIKE:
Grow your marriage after kids
Or this one on real tips from my family:
This was a guest post from Holly Easterby:
Holly speaks about raising kids, organizing the home and saving money on her blog, Bonza Brats. She is a friend of this blog and loves to share insights about her love for family, children and homemaking. Holly Easterby’s love for children has seen her featured in many education and children websites, whether talking about healthy snacks, motivating students or children’s fashion at Bonza Brats. Holly loves reading books, and shopping is her way of spending time with her young family. If you would like to catch her, you can via Google+ or Twitter: @HollyEasterby
Tanya Gioia says
Thank you for focusing on the positive in marriage. Always a work in progress!