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I recently heard something that I had to share:

“Every day when we wake up, we can focus on whatever we chose:
If we have a problem, we focus on that problem.
If we have somewhere to be, we focus on that place.
However, if you choose to focus on YOU, it makes all the difference.”

Think about being in an airplane. When the flight attendants teach you what to do in an emergency, they say “Put the oxygen mask on yourself first.” Why? Why not save those around you first?

Simple: IF YOU aren’t taken care of, you don’t have enough left to take care of someone else.

Sounds easy, right? That’s what I thought… until I heard these words: “Choosing you means that you are ignoring what others think.”

 

Wow. That is hard for me. I mean really hard.

Take my daughter, for example. She loves makeup. She loves to put it on herself; she loves to learn about it and practice using it. She loves to put it on me. The thing is: she’s five years old.

So, think about what is said about ME as her mom when SHE goes to the grocery store wearing her makeup. If it were sloppy and silly, people would giggle and say things like “Oh-how cute” or “Oh! You are having fun today, aren’t you?” but it isn’t sloppy or silly.

She’s quite amazing. She’s good at it. She takes her time, and she does a great job. She uses words like “Blending Brush” and “Lip Liner.” While some kids like learning about dinosaurs or trains, she is learning about eyeshadow and blush. She asks me to teach her different makeup tricks on a daily basis and then she wants to run off and practice what she has learned (usually on me) 🙂

However; To not feel judged by others, I used to make her take off her makeup before we go anywhere. Baseball games, grocery store, friend’s house. I made her take it off because it was out of the norm and I know that in the end, the judgment falls on me: MOM.

BE YOU!

Why did I care? Why did it bother me that THEY cared, when I knew that SHE was happy to be all dolled up for her brother’s baseball game in her Cinderella dress with matching sparkly makeup? She said that makeup & princess dresses make her feel like a princess. Don’t we all want to feel like a princess sometimes? 🙂

When I would let my self-doubt win, and when I would let the judgment of others make me feel bad, I was choosing OTHERS.

Not me.
Not her.

Others.

I’m letting others pick what is best for us. Why on earth would I let others have that kind of influence? Why would I discourage her because it’s not the norm?

One day, when she is doing makeup for the Oprah’s of the world, I’ll look back on these times and laugh that I ALMOST let the world discourage me because that would have, in turn, discouraged HER.

So, I will try to remember to choose me. By choosing ME, it means that when I feel like I am being judged, I just keep on being ME. You just keep on being YOU. We stay true to ourselves, not to our self-doubt, but to our true meaning.
I tried to put it into perspective.
  • As a blogger, I choose me when I write e-mails to you sharing what I’ve learned. It’s my way of helping others.
  • As a mom, I choose me when I act silly even when it’s out of my comfort zone because I want my kids to see me as me. It’s my way of letting them know that they can be anything, do anything, act however they feel… and I’ll still love them, just like they still love me.
  • As a teacher, I choose me when I allow my students to see me fail. Make mistakes. See that I’m not perfect. It’s my way of letting them grow as people, not as perfectionists.
  • As a person, I choose me when I clean the house. It is my way of keeping my sanity. If I let everything go, I would be grumpy and cranky and stressed.
  • As a wife, I choose me when I cook dinner. I know that my husband appreciates it and it makes me happy to make others happy.
  • As a sister, I choose me when I call my brother on the phone. He lives close, and he is busy with a family… choosing me means calling him even when he is busy because I always want to be his friend.

Every day – it’s a choice that we have to make. Focus on what we have. Focus on being happy with what we have. Choosing to do the things that make us happy. For me, making others happy is what makes me happy. We need just to slow down, focus on what matters & choose it.

Today… CHOOSE YOU, whatever that looks like.

Have a wonderful day!! 🙂

Becky

Ps- To get more of a sneak-peek into what my family & I do on a daily basis, I’d love to connect with you on Instagram. You can find me here.. 🙂

Hi there!

I’m Becky, a former elementary school teacher turned certified child development therapist and blogger. I work at home with my husband and together we are raising (and partially homeschooling) our four children in the Carolinas. I love diet coke, ice cream, and spending time with my family.

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1 Comment

  1. This post spoke volumes to me. Thank you. THANK YOU so much, Becky, for always sharing your words of wisdom!